Uncyclopedia artiklist Estonia:

Geography

Estonia is a warm country with fantastic weather in Southeast Asia. Legend goes that this is caused by Vladimir LII (7.) the Putty, current Russian czar.

There is a myth that Estonia is actually a bloody cold country which is west of Russia, north of Latvia, south of Finland and above the center of the Earth, but this idea is generally disregarded as a typical sign of exhaustion from blogging.

Estonia consists of 25 states, 14 asteroids and 2 parallel dimensions. There is a border struggle with Fiji concerning the dimensions at the moment.

Estonia has only 3 islands: Peipsi Island, A-Great-Egg-Hill-Island and Narva. Two of them are inhabited by rappers and there is no living nature in Narva.

The deepest lake of Estonia (Abja-Paluoja Mudlake) is also the deepest lake of Europe and Middle-Africa (depth 2.5 meters in the deepest point).

The people

All Estonians have dark hair, Nike shoes and drive Honda Civics (replacing Datsun Cherrys).

About 33% of 13-15 years old Estonians use tobacco.

All Estonians have computers and digital cameras.

Estonians are also called "the hardcore nation" or "the hardstyle nation".

The favourite food of Estonians is told to be another Estonian.

The national sport is keeping a blog for presenting marvelous photographs and write wet teenage poetry. Some of the bloggers are IT technicians. They are smart, altough the the blog-thing suggests otherwise.

About 300.000 Russians live in Estonia. 7 of them don't have a criminal record. This claim, made by several polititians, has been officially labeled as bogus due the fact that it's based on the short story "About 300.000 Russians Live in Estonia. 7 of Them Don't Have a Criminal Record" by Marju Länik. The story deals with the pantyfetish the author had in her childhood and is in no way related to the title.

About every 2,5th Estonian works as a security guard. It's been suggested that this is the reason for the highest suicide rate in Europe.

Religion and politics

About 98% of the population claim to be members of a church or cult. The membership divides as following among the better known organizations:

* 80,2% The Everlasting Church of Soap Opera
* 30,6% Long Live Tanel Padar!
* 48,4% Atheism
* 9% Hit Hard And Run Fast

It's a common tradition to belong to several churches.

The country's political slogan is: "If you like charity towards criminals, come to Estonia!"

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Administration

The king of Estonia is Edgar Savisaar (aka Savipäts, Tola, ninasarvik). At least this is how he thinks himself, as he is followed by cult called Isamaaliit. It's also a good tradition to distrust any administration and hold elections more frequently than the official required interval. That is why all the seniour citizens rebel against the law.

The vice president of Estonia is Homer Simpson who is known for his ambitions about world peace.